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FAQ’s
How do I join?
Simply select the "join now" button on the home page, fill in as many details as you like (*fields marked so are required), agree to our terms and conditions, select join now and you will soon receive a confirmation email in your inbox, click the link and you are free to browse. Make sure you add connect-me.com.au to your safe senders list in your email client. Once your profile / photos are approved you can contact other members.
How much does it cost?
connect-me.com.au is FREE
How do I use connect-me.com.au?
To communicate with other members on connect-me.com.au, you need to be registered and have an active profile. There are 3 ways you can communicate with another member – flirts, emails and instant messaging. Flirts are free and used to see if there is any connection between yourself and other members. If you choose to contact another member, you will need to have paid and active membership.
Flirt: is a message you can send to another member to let them know that you're interested and would like to get to know them.
Emails: you can send an email via our secure and safe internal email exchange. This is exactly the same as writing an email to a friend, where you can write what you want. Use our secure email system which gives you plenty of time to get to know other members via email before you exchange your personal email address or telephone number. If you receive an email from a member and don't wish to continue contact, please let them know you're not interested or add them to your Blocked List.
IM (Instant Messaging):To chat with another member you will need to have an active and paid membership
What's the best way to write a profile?
What you say about yourself speaks volumes. First of all, don't panic! It's a profile, not a life story. And it is meant to reflect something about you, so unless you are a prize winning author, people won't be expecting a literary masterpiece. Keep it light and friendly, and avoid adding anything negative. Never include your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information in your member profile.
Everyone wants to meet an honest person. It is extremely important that you portray yourself in an honest light from the very outset - starting with your profile. While discretion is recommended, lying is not, so be honest when you post your profile and photos. The 'real' people, the ones you want to meet, don't expect perfection. In fact, if someone seems too good to be true, they probably are. So be honest, be yourself and start off on the right foot. What might begin as an online flirtation could turn into the real thing unless you've built yourself an image you can't live up to.The more people know about you, the more comfortable they will feel in contacting you, or initiating conversation with you. So if you want to get a greater response to your profile, and begin meeting more people today then make sure you write a detailed profile.
How do I search?
There are many ways you can find people that match your interests - from name search to an advanced search which will narrow down your search results. You can search via the following methods using the search tab menu.
Name Search, Quick Search, Full Search, Matched Member Search, Location Based Search, Keyword Search
Can I cancel my membership?
You can cancel your membership at anytime by selecting "cancel membership" from the Quick Links Menu on the Home page. If you have any problems cancelling, please click here to cancel your membership
How many photos can I upload?
You can upload up to 10 photos
If you have any problems uploading photographs, email us your photo and we will upload for you.
Your public photos are viewable by all members, you have the option to give members access to your private photos.
What about Security?
Some of our members and people that have not ever used Connect-Me.com.au occasionally receive emails falsely claiming to be from Connect-Me.com.au.
connect-me.com.au will never ask you to provide details, passwords or other confidential information through email.
connect-me.com.au correspondence in relation to your account will always use the connect-me.com.au brand and will come from email addresses ending in '@Connect-Me.com.au'. connect-me.com.au will never put email addresses of members into any correspondence, we want our members to communicate through the connect-me.com.au website, this will protect your security.
If you have received an email you think is suspicious, please notify our customer support team support@connect-me.com.au.
Security Policy
When purchasing from connect-me.com.au, your financial details are passed through a secure server using the latest 128-bit SSL (secure sockets layer) encryption technology. 128-bit SSL encryption is approximated to take at least one trillion years to break, and is the industry standard. If you have any questions regarding our security policy, please contact our customer support centre support@connect-me.com.au
Customer Service Policy
If for any reason we are unable to dispatch your order, we will notify you within 5 business working days.
Guides to using connect-me.com.au
Safety and Safely Meeting
1. Never include your last name, real email address, personal Web site URL, home address, phone number, place of work, or any other identifying information in your profile or initial emails you exchange with other members. Take all the time you need to become comfortable with someone before revealing any personal contact information. Ask questions and make sure you are satisfied with the answers. Trust your instincts, move cautiously and be selective.
2. Don't give out your surname, phone numbers or address details to anyone over the Internet, until you feel safe to do so. If you choose to share your personal email address with another member, it is strongly recommended you create a web based email address such as Yahoo or Hotmail, and ensure you do not include your full name in the sender's details. Also, avoid using work emails, as it's often easy to work out who is john.person@address.com.au.
3. The beauty of meeting and relating online is that you can gradually collect information and then make a choice about pursuing the relationship in the real world. You are never obligated to meet anyone, regardless of your level of online intimacy. And even if you do decide to arrange a meeting, you always have the right to change your mind. It's possible that your decision to keep the relationship at the anonymous level is based on a hunch that you can't logically explain. Trust yourself.
4. If you decide to meet face-to-face, be sure to pick a safe location, full of people, and familiar to you. Always arrange to meet in a busy public place - and arrive and leave on your own, using your own transport. Avoid hikes, bike rides or drives in remote areas for the first few dates. If you decide to move to another location, take your own car.
5. At least at the beginning, take someone along if you are concerned, meet your date and ask the friend to meet up with you again at a pre-arranged time. Work out a signal with your friend to indicate whether you would prefer that he or she stay with you. If you're not with a friend, tell someone where you are going, who with (include the person's name, phone number and address) and when you'll be back. Most importantly, stick to it.
6. Initially, don't go home with your date, invite them back to your home or accept a lift.
7. If you feel uneasy about someone, there may be a reason. Don't tell yourself you're being silly. Diffuse the situation and get out of there. It's always better to be safe than sorry. Never worry or feel embarrassed about your behaviour. Your safety is much more important than one person's opinion of you.
Site Etiquette
Please be courteous by answering all flirts and emails. You should always be upfront when replying to a flirt to help ensure that no member pays for membership when it is obvious that you are not interested. If you receive an email remember that someone has paid to contact you, if you are not interested respond in a polite fashion. If you are feeling harrassed in anyway by any member you can block that member. Once you have blocked the member, they will not be able to view your profile or contact you. If you have any problems you can report a member and we will look into the problem and possibly ban them from the site.
ACCC Best Practice Guidelines for Dating Websites
•• Never send money to anyone you meet online
•• Met someone recently and they’ve already professed their love? Be careful—it could be a scam
•• If someone you met online says they need your help or your money it’s probably a scam
•• If someone asks you for money, don’t reply
•• Don’t share your banking or credit card details with anyone you meet online
•• If someone asks you to transfer money to them via a wire service, don’t do it
•• If someone asks to move your communications outside the website after only a few contacts, be
careful—scammers often ask for this
•• Anyone can fall for a scam—be careful and report any suspicious conduct here
•• Met someone who sounds too good to be true? Be careful—it could be a scam
•• If what you are seeing and hearing from someone does not match their profile, be careful—it could be
a scam
•• If someone offers to send you money orders to cash on their behalf, don’t do it—you may
be defrauded
Examples of scammer conduct
‘Did you know that scammers will often tell you they need money for medical treatment for a sick relative
or child?’
‘Scammers sometimes take a long time to build a relationship with you—never send money to anyone
you meet online, no matter how long you have been chatting with them’
‘A common tactic for scammers is to ask for money for flights, visas or other expenses and promise that
they will come and visit you—don’t be fooled’
‘Some scammers will tell you that they are in the military and need money for a leave pass so they can
visit you’
‘Sometimes a scammer’s description will not match their profile picture—be cautious and look carefully’
‘Scammers may claim to be recently widowed to gain your trust, sympathy and money!’
‘If anyone asks you for personal details such as banking details or credit card numbers, don’t
send them’
More detailed examples of scammer conduct
‘You should exercise caution wherever someone you meet online claims that they have been stationed
in Africa as an oil worker, aid worker or other job. Scammers will often use this excuse and ask you to
send money because of some crisis, like being robbed or becoming sick.’
‘Needing money for a plane ticket or travel expenses to visit you is a common story used by scammers.
They might ask you for money for a ticket or for visa or immigration fees. They may instead send you
a ‘genuine’ copy of their visa or plane ticket but then tell you they need money for an unexpected
expense. Don’t be fooled—scammers often have access to high quality fake documents.’
‘Scammers don’t just ask you for money. They may also ask you to provide personal details, such
as your name and address, bank account or credit card numbers and use this information to steal
your identity.’
‘Scammers might ask you to transfer money for them through your account, telling you it is because
they are unable to transfer the money themselves. You should never give out personal financial
information to anyone you meet online because of the risk of identity theft. Transferring money may also
involve you in money laundering, a serious crime, and expose you to fraud.’
‘If you are asked to cash money orders for someone you meet online, you should not do it. Scammers
often promise to send their victim money orders and ask the victim to cash the orders and wire the
money back. However, the money orders are fake, so after sending money to the scammer, the victim
finds themselves pursued by the bank for the value.’
‘Been offered a big payout by someone you met online? Scammers will use all kinds of stories to get
you to send money to them. They might tell you that the money will go to a charity, or be invested in a
business like oil exploration or gold mining. Alternatively, they may promise that paying money will allow
you to access a lottery prize, a long lost inheritance or treasure, like a cache of gemstones. What are the
chances that you will find both true love and millions of dollars online? Don’t respond to these offers.’
‘A recent popular story for scammers is to claim to be a soldier, stationed overseas and to say they need
you to send money for their expenses—often so they can purchase a leave pass to visit you. Don’t be
fooled—you should never send money to anyone you meet online.’
‘When a scammer asks you to send money, they will usually come up with a whole series of excuses for
why they need more. For example, a scammer who asks you for money for plane tickets may then tell
you they need more money for customs fees and an exit visa and then tell you they have been arrested
at the airport and need even more money to recover their possessions. You should never send money to
anyone you meet online.’
‘Be careful of sharing your personal information, such as your full name, address, birth date, family
details or intimate photographs and videos with people you meet online. These may be used by
scammers for the purposes of identity theft or blackmail.’
Detailed example of scam progression
Jessica, an Australian businesswoman in her forties, met a man called Martin on an online
dating website.
Martin’s profile said that he was an Australian stationed in Ghana as an aid worker. He was a widower
with a 10 year old daughter. Martin’s photo showed that he was attractive, well-dressed but not too
formal. He looked friendly and about the same age.
Martin’s interests were not very specific but appeared similar to Jessica’s own, namely sports and other
outdoors activities. Both were after a serious relationship and looking for a warm and loving partner.
Soon after getting in touch, Martin told Jessica that he could not reliably access the dating website from
Ghana and so they moved their communications to email and phone.
Jessica and Martin struck up a close relationship and exchanged regular emails and many phone calls.
Martin came across as sensitive and caring and often listened to her problems. He showed an interest
in her life, including her business affairs. He liked to call just to tell her he missed her and would love to
meet up. After several months Jessica felt that she could tell Martin anything and Martin confessed his
love for her.
Soon afterwards, Jessica received an email from Martin claiming that he had been mugged and lost his
wallet. He said that he was working away from his camp, and at the hotel where he was staying, the
hotel manager was holding his passport and refused to return it until he paid his next month’s bill. He
was soon to be paid but asked Jessica to advance him $1200 by wire transfer to help with his hotel bill.
Jessica thought he would pay her back so she wired the money across.
Some weeks later, Martin called Jessica in quite a state and told her that his daughter had been struck
by a car in a hit and run on her way to school and suffered a brain haemorrhage. He said that he
needed $8000 quickly, to pay for an expensive operation to save her life. Horrified by these events,
Jessica sent the money via wire transfer as it would be quicker.
Things were settled for a while and then Martin told Jessica that he had an opportunity to invest in oil
exploration in Ghana. The enterprise was to help out the poor local community and investors would be
well rewarded. He said that she was guaranteed a big return if she sent him $40 000 to invest. He said
that this would help them set up a home together when he returned to Australia soon.
Jessica was concerned because this was a large sum of money and asked her friends and relatives
what she should do. Some of her friends expressed concern that she may be dealing with an
online scammer.
Jessica questioned Martin’s motives. He told her he was very hurt and sent her photographs which he
claimed were photos of himself with his daughter and children in the local community. Jessica told her
friends that she knew and trusted him and decided to send the money anyway.
Over time, Jessica was asked to help out in a number of ways as well as pay for fees and taxes on her
‘investments’ until she had paid over $90 000. Some of Jessica’s friends showed her material about
online scams, so Jessica began to keep details about the relationship to herself. However, when Jessica
again mentioned her concerns to Martin, he told her that he “swore by almighty God” that he loved her
and the money she sent was being invested in their relationship.
It was hard, but soon Jessica had to admit to herself that there was something wrong. She thought
about how the conversations often turned to money and the requests for more were becoming very
frequent. One day after he had asked for more money to organise travel to Australia she decided to
stop. Martin’s emails and phone calls became increasingly insistent and angry. The phone calls were the
worst because he knew how to push all the right buttons. She should have hung up straight away but
she still felt something for him.
Jessica felt devastated that a man she had been sharing so much of herself with for so long and felt she
could trust implicitly had been a scammer. In addition to these mental and emotional costs, she had also
sent the scammer in excess of $90 000—most of her life savings.
She found it hard to discuss this with her family and friends because she felt so foolish. They had
warned her but she trusted the scammer over those truly closest to her. When she did her own research
she found that she was not alone. Many others had had similar experiences.
What is a dating scam?
On a dating website, a scammer is someone who builds a relationship with you, pretending to be a legitimate
user of a dating website, and then uses fraudulent claims to defraud you. Scammers will ask you for money,
personal or financial information, or try to redirect you to websites that require payment or download malicious
software onto your computer.
Scams of this sort can be very sophisticated and scammers will go to great lengths to build a relationship with
you, spending a lot of time communicating with you and perhaps even telling you they love you and sending
you gifts.
The key rule is that you should never send money to anyone you meet online and should reconsider your
relationship with anyone who asks you for money or who you otherwise suspect may be a scammer.
Scammers will often ask you to send money via a wire transfer service and you will usually be unable to recover
money sent this way. You should also never share personal information, such as bank account or credit card
details, as you risk falling victim to fraud and identity theft.
How can I spot a scammer?
Any of the following behaviours should raise concerns that the person you are interacting with is a scammer:
•• they ask you to send them money or provide your personal or financial details
•• they ask you to transfer money via a wire transfer service
•• they quickly profess strong feelings or love for you
•• they are vague about their interests, or what they want in a partner
•• they do not answer your questions or their responses are formulaic, nonsensical or repetitive
•• they claim to be stationed in or travel frequently to Africa or elsewhere overseas
•• their profile, or their communications with you display poor spelling or grammar.
You should carefully consider your relationship with anyone who asks you to move communications with them
away from the dating website onto email, instant messaging, the phone, VoIP or some other medium after only
a few contacts. Scammers will often ask you to do this so that you will be communicating only with them, are
more likely to reveal personal information and will not receive safety warnings.
You should never respond to a request for money, personal information or banking details, no matter the
reason given.
What should I do if I think I have been scammed?
1: Cease communication
If you think you have been scammed, the first step is to immediately cease communication with the scammer, to
avoid losing more money or giving away more personal information.
2: Contact website operator
You should report the scammer to the dating website where you first contacted them, as they may be targeting
other users. You should provide the website operator with as much information about the scammer as possible.
This may include examples of emails or instant messaging communications received from the scammer and
photos, names and addresses, email addresses or phone numbers used by the scammer.
3: Contact your financial institution
If you have sent money to the scammer and particularly if you have provided any personal or financial details,
you should contact your financial institution and inform them. If you have given the scammer information
such as account numbers, credit card numbers or passwords you should immediately change them. If you
used a service, such as a money transfer service, to send money to the scammer you should contact the
service provider.
4: Report the scam to the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission (ACCC)
Reporting a scam to the ACCC assists with monitoring scam trends. You can report a scam to the ACCC
via the online reporting form on the ACCC’s SCAMwatch website www.scamwatch.gov.au. The details of
complaints made to the ACCC will be kept confidential.
5: Contact police
If you have sent money to the scammer, you should contact your state or territory police and report your loss. If
someone attempts to blackmail you, or makes threats of any kind, you should contact the police immediately.
6: Beware of future contact
Scammers will often contact you under new guises to try and get more money from you. They may pretend
to be lawyers, government officials or police, often from another country, and claim that they have caught the
scammer and need money to recover your losses. You should never send money—the scammers are simply
trying to get more out of you.
Specific scenarios
Someone has asked me for money for airline tickets or other travel expenses, is
this a scam?
This sounds like a common scam. You should never send money to anyone you meet online. Scammers often
promise to visit you, then pocket any money you send them. Don’t send money for plane tickets, visas, customs
fees or any other travel expenses the scammer claims to have. They may send you copies of their passport,
tickets or visa to ‘prove’ they are coming to
They claim to be in the military and say they need money for a leave pass what should I do?
This is another common scam and you should never send money. Scammers claiming to be members of the
military will often say they need your money to pay for a leave pass or some other expense so they can visit you.
This is just an excuse to get you to pay money.
I’ve been asked to pay money to a charity or to support a business opportunity—is this a scam?
Scammers will often tell you that money you send them will go to a charity or will be used to support a business
venture. This might be anything from oil exploration to gold mining, gemstone sales and more. The scammer
might also tell you they can access some kind of treasure or inheritance and say that they need money to
recover it, resolve legal issues or get a valuable item through customs. You should not send money. Charities
don’t solicit donations through dating websites and any stories about great riches are just a ploy to get you to
make a scammer rich.
I’ve been told I need to send money because of an emergency—is this a scam?
A medical, legal or other emergency is a common excuse used by scammers to get at your money. To create a
sense of emergency, scammers will often tell you that:
•• they or a relative, often a child, is sick or injured (often in a car accident or hit and run) and needs money for
medical treatment
•• they have been robbed or lost their wallet and need money to pay living expenses, a hotel bill or the police
•• they have been arrested or detained by immigration authorities and need money for bribes, visa or
customs fees
•• they have been kidnapped and need your help to pay the ransom.
These stories are designed to make you feel as if the situation is desperate and to get you to send money
without thinking. However, you should never send money to anyone you meet online.
My online dating partner says they can’t continue chatting with me unless I send money—what should I do?
You should not send money. Scammers will often claim they need you to send them money or they won’t be
able to communicate with you in the future. They may say that they need money to access the internet, to
purchase a webcam or computer, to pay for a translation service or other living expenses.
I’ve been asked to transfer money for my online dating partner—should I do it?
You should never agree to transfer money for someone else—this may be money laundering, which is a criminal
offence. This may also be an attempt to get you to provide personal information for identity theft.
Advice to scam victims
1: Cease communication
If you think you have been scammed, the first step is to immediately cease communication with the scammer, to
avoid losing more money or giving away more personal information.
2: Contact website operator
You should report the scammer to the dating website where you first contacted them, as they may be targeting
other users. Details of your report will be kept confidential. You should provide the website operator with as
much information about the scammer as possible. This may include examples of emails or instant messaging
communications received from the scammer and photos, names and addresses, email addresses or phone
numbers used by the scammer.
3: Contact your financial institution
If you have sent money to the scammer and particularly if you have provided any personal or financial details,
you should contact your financial institution and inform them. If you have given the scammer information
such as account numbers, credit card numbers or passwords you should immediately change them. If you
used a service, such as a money transfer service to send money to the scammer you should contact the
service provider.
4: Report the scam to the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission (ACCC)
Reporting a scam to the ACCC assists with monitoring scam trends. You can report a scam to the ACCC
via the online reporting form on the ACCC’s SCAMwatch website www.scamwatch.gov.au. The details of
complaints made to the ACCC will be kept confidential.
5: Contact police
If you have sent money to the scammer, you should contact your state or territory police and report your loss. If
someone attempts to blackmail you, or makes threats of any kind, contact police immediately.
Updated 07/03/12 |
